Sometimes strokes almost touch

Sometimes strokes almost touch,

On the edge of my canvas, they sway,

Like shy colors, they ask for much,

But vanish when I try to obtain.

I chase them through my mixed paint,

In my palette, they play hide and seek,

Each stroke tells a story, without restraint,

Yet the perfect one remains meek.

I blend and dab, I layer and trace,

But art has its mysterious scheme,

Like fleeting visions in a sacred space,

They slip away, leaving me to dream.

I felt inspired to imitate Julia Alvarez’s “Sometimes the Words Are So Close” for my creative project. For my piece, “Sometimes the Strokes Are So Close”, I wanted to incorporate a series of her writing into mine. For instance, in the poem, Alvarez has a poem written in a first-person view, giving the readers insight into her thoughts, emotions, and experiences. Having a first-person view creates a sense of intimacy and can help the readers understand the struggles. I also enjoyed reading Alvarez’s work as I liked the creative aspect and understanding her thought process through her drafts. 

I decided to take some of the aspects that I talked about above into my poem, except my poem explores the frustration that occurs in the creative process. As well as talking about the need to have the painting be so perfect and the idea that the “speaker” struggles with bringing their artistic vision to life. I decided to start the poem off by rewording Alvarez’s first line, “Sometimes the words are so close,” to “Sometimes strokes almost touch”. I noticed that the structure of Alvarez’s poem was free verse so I decided to stick with the same style, so the poem has less of a rhyming scheme and the lines vary with the length. Something else that I noticed within Alvarez’s writing was the self-discovery that she was learning and how she was trying to express herself. This is something that I felt was a key element within her writing and was something very personal yet private at the same time. To incorporate this into my writing I thought of what I felt passionate about and what is something that I’ve personally struggled with and that other people may or may not understand. Another significant piece of Alvarez’s writing that I noticed (and talked a bit about before) and incorporated into my poem was the use of personal pronouns as it creates a more personal relationship and bond.

“I chase them through my mixed paint, In my palette, they play hide and seek,” (Line 5-6), I incorporated the feeling of the palette playing hide and seek to create a more relevant or familiar experience to “chasing” ideas or inspiration. A lot of people are artists whether they acknowledge or realize it, for instance, writing this project! I personally always struggle to begin any sort of project whether that be for academics or just for fun, I felt that the overall topic would create something relatable for the audience. Additionally, I decided to adjust the wordplay as I felt that it was much needed especially when describing painting as there are different senses and imagery that occur. For instance, “shy colors” and “fleeting visions”. Painting is a universal activity that typically occurred when people were younger and the description of painting brings the memories of how simple and complicated it is. It ideally makes the audience feel some sort of deja vu as they remember their childhood. 

Yue Wu-Jamison

My Mistress’ beauty is nothing like her recent IG post

1. My Mistress’ beauty is nothing like her recent IG post
2. Filter is far more smooth than her skin’s texture
3. If angles on instagram make her beauty engrossed
4. Why does the reality of her body lose its structure 
5. Through a screen her posts upholds a perfect disguise 
6. In a pixelated world her gleaming eyes are the prize
7. No airbrush editing can improvise 
8. The authenticity where her candid self hides
9. She sees my love in the number of her likes
10. But her laughter is where I find happiness behold
11. When her legitimate smile strikes
12. It’s worth more than a social media facade can uphold 
13. Beyond the social screen her true beauty lies within
14. Her genuine splendor makes my heart spin 

For my piece, “My mistress’ beauty is nothing like her recent IG post,” I was inspired to imitate Shakespeare’s sonnet, “My mistress’ eyes are nothing like the sun.” So, when thinking of how to make Shakespeare’s sonnet fit our modern age, I immediately thought of social media and different ways to integrate the topic into a sonnet form.  The speaker in Shakespeare’s piece compares his mistress to different world beauties, like the sun. However, the speaker also compares different body parts of his mistress, like her hair and lips. The speaker’s comparison made me think of how frequently people are critical of how they present themselves on social media and even go as far as to compare themselves to different people on multiple platforms. 

So, for my piece, I wanted to have the same aspects of the speaker in Shakespeare’s sonnet, where he compares his lover to different things. Still, for my piece, I wanted my speaker to compare their lover to their Instagram posts and how the speaker doesn’t believe his lover looks like that in person. So I began with a similar opening to Shakespeare, saying, “My Mistress’s beauty is nothing like her recent IG post.”  Yet, I had to keep in mind that the rhyming scheme is every other line, so finding words that rhyme but also flow was a little tricky. I included different aspects people think of when they think of social media. For instance, I continued by saying, “Filter is far smoother than her skin’s texture; if angles on Instagram make her beauty engrossed, Why does the reality of her body lose its structure.” In this, I’m comparing the lover’s skin to the filter she uses, which blurs out her textured skin. People can use angles to get a desired look, but the speaker realizes that their lover’s body does not look like that in real life. 

I tried to include the lover’s body because the Shakespearean sonnet is a lot about physical love, a somewhat sensual love. There is also a slant rhyme within lines two and four. My volta appears in line nine, where the speaker shifts from talking about the facade their lover keeps up on social screens to how the speaker finds happiness with his lover in simple moments, like where the lover portrays pure happiness. My couplet, “Beyond the social screen her true beauty lies within; Her genuine splendor makes my heart spin,” is meant to answer why the speaker’s lover’s beauty on Instagram doesn’t grasp their attention. The answer is that the lover does not present their genuine self on social media, and the speaker is in love with their lover’s genuine self rather than a facade they hold on social media.

Janayah Applon

Everything, but Perfect

By Michael Davis 

I am 

not per fect or pure.

Not some thing easy to love, 

or some one you would facetime to comfort you.

Neit ther do I symbolize romance- 

of new exper iences, 

of old mem ories to appreciate. 

Although i’m not per fect, 

the imperfections make me, me 

I am 

a free spirit in this per fect world. 

F-r-e-e 

like a bird fly ing in the sky, 

my skin feel ing 

every bit of bre eze. 

Often I am over looked. 

Perf ection is expected, 

I am nothing without mistakes. 

In this “pe rfect” world, 

we all have our flaws.

Flaws make us unique. 

Review:

I decided to recreate the poem, ‘The Rose and The Poppy’ by Adrianna Puente.  I did not completely change the meaning of the poem, I just simply made it more straight forward. The poem talks about a poppy flower that’s overlooked because it is not a “perfect rose”. Adrianna Puente uses personification in this poem to make the poppy flower the speaker of this poem. The speaker of the poem talks about everything they’re not, but accepts everything that they are.  For my poem I changed it up and talk about how all of our imperfections make us who we are. From lines 1-7 of my poem, the speaker acknowledges that they are not perfect. In these lines the tone of the poem is very mellow.  In lines 3-4 the speaker says, “Not some thing easy to love, 

or some one you would facetime to comfort you.” The speaker is preparing their future partner for their relationship. Whoever ends up with the speaker needs to be all in for their love to last. When the speaker talks about facetime they are saying they do not feel that they are worthy of comforting someone during a tough time. From lines 8-9 the tone shifts from mellow to upbeat and powerful. Lines 8-9 say, “Although i’m not per fect, 

the imperfections make me, me”… Again the speaker puts it out there that they are not perfect, but now the speaker is comfortable with that. These imperfections make him his true self. In today’s world a lot of people cannot accept that they are not perfect. People are driven to get surgery in hopes to look “perfect”. Social media is a big factor in why people aren’t happy with themselves. On social media there’s guys with six packs and girls with tiny waists, and that’s what people think they have to look like. I hope that after reading my poem, people start accepting who they are. Throughout my poem a lot of  the words are broken up in half. For instance, “I am 

a free spirit in this per fect world. 

F-r-e-e 

like a bird fly ing in the sky, 

my skin feel ing 

every bit of bre eze.” I broke up these words to show that even words have their imperfections. There were a couple of times that I did not break up the words. In lines 9, 18, and 20 none of the words were broken up.  These are intact because the speaker is accepting that the imperfections, flaws, and mistakes make them special. The lines with non broken up words represent acceptance of who you are. 

Metaphor Like a Trick or Real.

Ode 44 was the poem that caught my attention mostly. I didn’t really understood what Hafez was exactly comparing love to was it God and love or was he comparing woman and his Love? Hafez believed we were full of imperfections and we’re all not perfect throughout his poem he uses figurative language like metaphor and personification. This poem embraced Islamic spiritually because of the metaphors that this poem had. He uses metaphors in many lines the line that caught my attention the most was “filled full of frolic to her wine-red lips” the way he uses metaphor here is because we don’t exactly know who “her” is and he doesn’t exactly mean her lips are red this line can mean different things but it will not mean the most obvious.

Hafez represented the love between “wine” and “love” but this is also a metaphor because wine, doesn’t exactly have to be wine it can be his past lover or wine can mean something completely differently. Hafez uses another figurative language smile he compares wine and love “A double traitor he to wine and love” but what exactly is he comparing? We know his comparing wine and love but we don’t exactly know what wine is… Which is why he uses metaphors all over his poem. Another metaphor he states out is “With wine and woman brimming o’er with laughter!” now his talking about woman but he doesn’t exactly mean that wine and woman connect, it’s just a line that tries to trick us into thinking the obvious but in reality it’s just a metaphor talking about something completely different. He uses Metaphors, Stanzas, and similes to try to get us into thinking something else, when really his comparing religion and love his recognizing the imperfections of human beings because he truly believes that we’re not perfect which is why I believe that he is representing love between him and god and is embracing Islamic “spiritually” because his not actually saying it into his poem but instead uses figurative language like metaphors.

Ana Munos.

Get Through It

Get Through It (Lyrics)

By Diane Tarabay

About to tell you something I don’t know where to begin 

been silent all my life and I’m just tired of holding in 

you don’t see my bruises you don’t see the pain with in 

all you know is how to judge the color of my skin 

See I don’t wanna be here I didn’t want to leave my home 

running through the desert was afraid and all alone 

see let me tell you something 

let me tell you loud and clear 

I’m done with all this bullshit  I no longer want to fear

left my family behind 

their everything that I had 

ma look into my eyes I don’t wanna see you sad 

this is how life goes 

this is how life always goes 

people come and go and their hate always seems to grow 

This a story bout my pain this a story about my

struggle I didn’t come here on a plane I came here

through a smuggle 

what’d you f**kin do?

tell me what’d f**kin do?

I was only 9 years old and I didn’t have a clue 

mama why you crying mama? 

why you always crying? 

I know I’m only 9 years old 

but I know when you are lying 

(2×)I’m just trying to help you out

I’m just trying to make things better 

always be here for you when you feel under the weather 

I have to find a better life 

how do I do it?

I heard about the desert I think I can get through it 

see this is why we do it

Review:

Dear Mr. Zamora,

After reading and hearing your performance of the poem, “To President-Elect”, I was reminded why I have a love for poetry. The emotion that you put into that poem was astonishing. I could feel the frustration radiating from each line and the words you used were extremely vivid to the point in which I felt like I was that nine-year old. Your poem was short and simple and I think that’s the best way to tell a story. There was no rhyme or any deeper thoughts that had to be over analyzed. It was simply a story about the struggle that many illegal immigrants have to experience in order to come to the United States. 

Your poem inspired me to write something of my own. I imitated your poem through a rap song because I knew it would be the best medium to attract a contemporary audience. I completely changed most of the form of your poem but I made sure to maintain the same tone, theme, vivid language and freestyle. Your poem consisted of 16 short lines yet it perfectly captured a whole experience. I felt that I wanted to expand more on the topic of your poem. My main focus was to humanize the illegal immigrant story. 

The rap song is addressed to people who discriminate against illegal immigrants. I want them to understand the reasons why many decide to face the dangers of crossing through a desert inorder to arrive to the “land of opportunity”. Just like in your poem, I talk about crossing through a dessert all alone. I knew that writing my rap song for others to read would not suffice so I performed it through a recording. Through my performance, you can hear the tone that I want my audience to feel. I was able to express those feelings of frustration and anger. The first four lines of the rap song end with words that rhyme. I did this on purpose in order to make it sound poetic. There are many instances throughout the rap in which I do the same thing. I also repeat certain lines in order to underline key point that I want to make clear to my audience. 

Writing this rap song was not an easy thing. I had to keep the beat in mind in order for the song to flow. I tried to not go too overboard with the rhyming but I got carried away in some sections. Thankfully, It all came together in the end. My goal was to express the anger and frustration that illegal immigrants experience due to situations that they have to encounter like crossing desserts to come to a country that discriminates against them. I hope that you enjoyed my recreation of your poem.

Sincerely,

Diane Tarabay

THE DUMBBELL

The Dumbbell

A broken DUMBBELL, Trainer, thy student trains,

Made of a bicep and sculpted with muscle pains:

Whose gains are as thy plans did dictate;

No other trainer’s plans could replicate.

A BICEP grown

Is more than bone,

As nothing but

Thy diet doth cut.

Wherefore each thing

Of my frail being

Meet in this gym,

to sing you a hymn:

That if I happen to keep this physique,

heeding my call, for you they will seek.

Oh, let thy blessed WORKOUT be mine,

And sanctify this DUMBBELL to be thine.

Review:

            For this assignment I took the structure of the poem “The Altar” by George Herbert and created my own rendition called “The Dumbbell”. In this poem I took the religious aspects and themes of the inspiring piece and swapped it out with exercise and physique to mirror today’s obsession, and near religious reverence, of self-image.

            The first step of this process was going through the poem and switching out key words and phrases, that are religious, with modern day exercise phrases, terms, slang, etc. that can match the original’s tone and relative importance. So, I took the word “Altar”, a very well-known religious symbol and switched it to the word Dumbbell, an incredibly well-known (if not the most) piece of exercise equipment. This also is a reference to the original poem as, this allowed me to construct this in the same shape as the original. This makes the poem even kind of seem like a case of mistaken identification of the shape, which toward the parody-like nature of it.

            Structurally, as I have already referenced before, this poem is in (roughly) the same shape of the original, just re-interpreted. I worked my hardest to keep all of the punctuation the same as well, but when It came to me writing line 14, I had to add a comma for the sake of understanding; because otherwise feel that the meaning could have been lost. In addition, I was able to keep the overall structure of rhyming in the poem. Wherever I observed that there was a rhyme in the original, I made sure that the new word would as well. However, I was not able to keep the exact same rhyme used in the original, but I tried to as much as possible.

             For instance, The ending of the 5^th and 6^th of the original respectively are “alone” and “bone” and in my version the endings of those lines are “grown” and “bone” , but in situations like the 1^st and 2^nd lines, which in the original are “rears” and “tears”, I could not find anything acceptable that ended in in -ears, so I used “trains” and “pains” (which at least keeps the -s endings)

            Thematically I feel that this poem hits the mark very well. Nowadays, the importance of religion and the church is declining all over the world. At the same time, through outlets such as social media and other broadcasted media, the importance of self-image and in turn fitness has become more and more important to people. This is why the dumbbell is being described and used as practically a spiritual totem in the modern religion of fitness.

Thank You for Reading!

Best Wishes,

Andrew Hardy

paint me.

Jocelyn Lemus

“untitled.”

the sensation of being in a box full of polluted air killing the soft lungs inside me. 

my hands full of wet blisters peeling, como las naranjas frescas de un árbol.

the sensation of fire dripping from my forehead, oh no! that is just sweat.

my back aching from the hunches, nunca como el dolor de una madre dando luz.

the sensation of what we call “pain” eating at our fresh like if there was no tomorrow. 

my family, they are who i dig floors for, los que me hacen luchar para seguir.

the feeling of chemicals and oils penetrating my dry skin.

my life is not the one i asked for, pero nunca reniego por lo que Dios me dío.

the world where i cannot be myself without being judge.

cuéntame lo que te hace seguir, y yo te hablo más con detalles.

let me be your immigrant.

let me penetrate my dark and dry feet into the dirt of “your” land.

let me carve my initials on your brown wooden porch.

let me scare you with the color of my skin.

let me wear my hoodie while walking down your street.

let me look at you with my bare eyes, just to scare you away.

i’ll let you assume the worst of me.

i’ll let the world paint me an image of myself.

let me be your favorite American.

let me wear your colors.

let me bleach my skin.

let me eat your apple pies.

let me breathe. 

i am your American now.

---

Review:

When we are given information, as humans we either decide to expand on those ideas or to let it be the way it is. Being able to only choose one piece of poetry was incredibly difficult for me because all of them create their own image. Therefore, I decided to implement imitations from five different poems we read and analyzed in this course. These are the top five poems my imitation skills were able to take upon:

“My Brother at 3AM” by Natalie Diaz

“The Tired Worker” by Claude McKay

“To President-Elect” by Javier Zamora

“Mexicans Begin Jogging” by Gary Soto

“Queens, 1963” by Julia Alvarez

To begin with, when creating this poem I used my ability to connect between different poems we did in our class. To give a broader meaning of this imitation I created and gathered up the ideas of free-verse with a pinch of five different poems. It’s like a pizza, with five different toppings, each defining the meaning of the flavor. I mean, who wouldn’t put so many toppings on a pizza?

To elaborate, the reason my imitation defines the original text of those different poem above, it’s because my poem depicts different sets of audiences with inverted meanings. For instance, it gives the perspective of an immigrant worker and their mentality. But, my poem also elaborates to how the perspectives of African Americans. It varies as one reads it. There’s so many meaning to it, one must dig deep to understand. Every single detail matters in a piece of art. This poem demonstrates a modern piece that is able to formulate how immigrants and African-Americans feel about their race and about the way they define themselves. The Spanish translation means a lot when one finishes reading the poem. It shows how those who were not appreciated and accepted for their roots, shifted to Americanization because they believed that was the only salvation to that land.

Now, you may ask how does each poem formulate the imitated poem of mine’s.

Well let me just begin, “My Brother at 3AM” is a symbol of self-identity and I was able to depict that message and shape it onto my poem. I was able to demonstrate how the identity of the poem was extremely changing as one keeps reading it. You go from being yourself to being someone else’s satisfaction just to fulfill their expectations. We hide inside the mask for so long that it becomes a habit. Some times we are strictly told to be this be that, which discourages is to even praise who we truly are. We soon become so overwhelmed by what we are being told, that we decide to glue on the mask onto our face, so we don’t get the urge to take it off and show our real self because of judgement and discrimination.

For the next three poems, “The Tired Worker,”To President-Elect, and “Mexicans Begin Jogging” these elaborate the imitation onto my poem by giving the perspective of an immigrant with or without papers. My poem describes how one is being asked to be in such land without being oppressed by it. It’s about being able to ask for acceptance of who they are and being giving it. All these poems shape my imitation because, “The Tired Worker” talks about how one is so stuck in the norms of their life, which is to work and work. That’s how an immigrant feels in America, like as if their days have no difference. This also refers to the poem of “Mexicans Begin Jogging” because even though someone has papers, they aren’t considered American either. As much as that person wants to believe it, society doesn’t allow it. They are forbidden to become any type of American. And, “To President-Elect” that was also another imitation onto my poem, because this one refers to how one has to run and has to survive the biggest pieces of life in order to keep going. My poem demonstrates how one is running, but they stop due to society and their expectations.

The last connection and imitation that I dedicated to my poem was given from “Queens,1963.” I became inspired when this poem talked about the oppression the black people felt inside a community of whites or other races that were not so dark skin. My poem gives out the imitation of this poem because I elaborate on how blacks are not welcomed to walk down the street of certain communities because they are seen as a target and a threat.

I used my ability to implement strategies into my poem in order to master the imitation. Even though it’s not perfect, I tried implementing figurative devices into the free-verse, and I’ve give it an audience and I used third person to make it seem as more serious among the reader.

La im stly, one may noticed that the title of this poem is “untitled.” The reason why I decided to title my poem this way it’s because it shapes the meaning of the poem. It allows the reader to understand that when one person goes through discrimination and/or oppression in so many ways, it is so much harder to find a way out of it. We try to pin the needles into our skin in order to figure out how to sow the pieces of what and who we really are. It wasn’t always about the way we view ourselves, but about the way the world viewed us. As humans we stand in a position where if society doesn’t accept us, then no one will, not even ourselves. Being untitled is where I stand if I don’t fit in any culture, not even on my own roots then why even try.

Acceptance was our salvation.

 

Tropic Shadows for the win

All the blog posts are good and give a better insight of each poem described but I believe the best blog post is Tropic Shadows. I feel like this blog post is an A and does the best job at explaining New York City as a trap. For the other blog posts, White America is a B+ and the last blog post a B-. Again the other blog posts did do a good job at coming up with original ideas and they all mentioned the rhyme scheme but Tropic Shadows stood out the most and many people commented under the post with good reviews. They mention pseudo-freedom to explain the way the speaker thought New York was going to be like, also this person has very good grammar and diction. They had textual evidence that supported their thesis and their thesis was clearly stated.   

Natalie Rodriguez