Small Changes Can Make Great Impact

The meaning of Alvarez’s “Sometimes the Words are So Close” of what it means to be a writer is altered by demonstrating the multiple changes and transitions she did in earlier drafts of the poem. Her earlier drafts demonstrate those moments writers have when they are in the process of writing something. Alvarez proves that sometimes writing can be simply done quickly, but other times to share a meaning with more creativity a little more or a lot more critical thinking may be necessary. This is what I noticed as a reader; she was attempting to find the best way to express herself to her readers. How do I know? Reading through her earlier drafts, I noticed that her poem was much shorter and the untraditional sonnet structure was kept, but more words were added for the final version. For her final, Alvarez made sure to create a 14-line sonnet. Her earlier draft was 11 lines and was untitled. In her earlier drafts, she begins the poem like the first stating, “Sometimes the words are so close, I am more who I am when I’m down on paper than anything else, as if my life were a practice for the real me-” (Alvarez, Lines 1-4). There is a small detail that was changed. The final adds, “As if my life were practicing for the real me-” Small punctuation changes were made, but what’s interesting was the final was written in progressive verb tense, meaning that she changed it to make that message more direct towards the reader that “this is something I am still going through.” This demonstrates how such a small change can make a big impact when you’re expressing yourself in writing.

The earlier drafts and final show that this poem is about writing and what it means to be a writer, however, she assures that her final draft makes it obvious that she is a female writer and she adds, “you”. Her earlier drafts didn’t focus on that. This is precisely why her earlier drafts were shorter. The final states, “I was once in as many drafts as you. But briefly, essentially, here I am: Who touches this poem touches a woman.” (Alvarez, Lines 12-14). In her previous drafts, she wrote, “My flood comes through in so many drafts, But briefly, essentially, here I am. who touches these words touches myself.” What is the difference between both, how does this enhance the whole meaning of her poem? Well, in general, this poem has to do with Alvarez and who she is. Her final draft makes sure that the readers get that message. She makes that more direct by adding “you” within her poem. This is what her early drafts lack; directness. They do prove how expressing oneself can be complicated sometimes and can be easier to express on paper over speaking, but her final not only demonstrates who she is as a writer but brings confidence to others who are possibly struggling to express themselves as well.

This is how her earlier drafts alter the overall meaning of her poem. Her earlier drafts are a literal example of, “I was once in as many drafts as you.” (Alvarez, Line 11). Even without the drafts, her message could be received, but by having access to those drafts, we get to actually see what she means.

The Importance of Creativity

Grading “Tropic Shadows” was a difficult task, but it had to be done. This is because it is a good blog post, but it was lacking something, leaving me unsure of what grade to give, at first. The post provided the reader with a clear thesis, one that was interesting and unique, but it lacked a sufficient amount of evidence. Additionally, the evidence that it did provide was not expanded on and thus was unable to support the thesis efficiently. For example, the author talks about how both poems they are writing about, “Subway Wind” and “The Tropics of New York”, are sonnets, but they did not really provide a compelling argument for why that aspect of the poems is significant. Because of the post’s lack of contextual evidence, the grade I am giving “Tropic Shadows” is a B+.

“White Americaaaaaaaa”, on the other hand, was rather easy to grade. This is because the thesis was unoriginal, in the terms that I felt like I had seen it a million times. Additionally, the post did not tie the contextual evidence that was provided in a manner that convinced me of what the author was trying to say about the two poems. However, despite the posts lack of a unique thesis and contextual evidence, I am unable to give it less than a B-. This is because it make an honest attempt at providing an interpretation of of the two poems and it did do what the prompt was asking. However, it lacked any creativity, leaving it with a B- grade.

Finally, on to my favorite post: “The Great Divide”. This post was the best because it offered a rather interesting thesis as well as well interpreted contextual evidence. Despite all of this, though, the post deserves only an A-. This is because, although it does have all of the important qualities of a blog post, it is not truly exquisite. This is because the author does not actually provide the lines from the poems that they use as evidence, they simply state their significance and role in the poems. This is why the post deserves an A-.

Out of the three blog posts, “The Great Divide” Deserved the highest grade because it provided a a clear and creative thesis, as well as contextual evidence that really provided convinced me of what the author was trying to say.

Sophia Wallace-Boyd

Life sustains itself in the ‘Wrong’ by: Mitaya B. La Pierre

Ben Jonson’s “Still to be Neat”, and Robert Herrick’s “Delight in Disorder” both induce a feeling of pleasure in the ‘unkempt’ within both of their poems. Though they are similarly attracted to the imperfection of art, they write their poems in two different meters. In Jonson’s poem, he uses Dactylic Dimeter as his primary prosody throughout the poem. “Still to be neat, Still to be dressed” (line 1), ‘Still’ , ‘neat’, and ‘dressed’ are all stressed while ‘to be’ is not; this sequence of word playing makes it seem like a well measured order. Having a similar fall as well as rise within the line, creating an orderly, proper stanza.  In the second line it does the exact same thing, “As you are going to a feast;”; it rises and falls at a timely pace throughout the line; stressing at ‘As’, ‘go-’ , and ‘feast’. However, you head to the 9nth line, and the rhythm takes a turn– “Robes loosely flowing, hair as free;” suddenly it becomes trochaic, with ‘stressed’ followed by ‘unstressed’ syllable, repeatedly. This I believe, is suppose to represent unperturbed randomness that imperfection gives us. When going from stressed to unstressed, you create an unsure ‘wave’, as you will, of stark and rambunctious repeating. While earlier in the lines, it was well calculated to create a ‘soft wave’ of the rhythmic pattern; stressed-unstressed-unstressed-stressed; it is at a higher frequency of stressed and unstressed syllables now that it is describing an imperfection of art, rather than a proper placement of it.

Robert Herrick also manages something of the like in his poem “Delight in Disorder”. In lines 1 and 2 he states this- 

“A sweet disorder in the dress  

Kindles in clothes a wantonness”. 

From the first few lyrics I could tell that the main prosody of this poem was Iambic Tetrameter; ‘A’ , ‘-order’, and ‘the’ being unstressed, while ‘dress’, ‘sweet’, and ‘dis-’ were stressed and it remains that way for the next couple of lines. Now unlike Jonson’s poem; it remains in the constant rise and fall of syllables, erratic throughout the poem. Almost like he is curating that imperfect rhythm to have the audience experience it as well. Here is a description of that imperfection from the poem- 

“A cuff neglectful, and thereby 

 Ribands to flow confusedly;

 a winning wave, deserving note,

 in the tempestuous petticoat;-” (line 7-9)

In something as simple as clothing, there are dysfunctions; a cuff ‘neglectful’ even though it is impossible for a shirt cuff to be ‘neglectful’, resonates with the audience the grandiose of slight imperfections, as well as the beauty of that disaster. Herrick understands that, and that is why he keeps the upbeat rhythm of the iambic in his poem, to show the some what catastrophic-to-calm beauty that is imperfection in art.

In the end of both of their poems, they come to an agreement about imperfect art being enjoyed at the heart. That precision may be perceived better at sight, but the true sensations and feelings you get from any work come from the distinctions and ‘wrongs’ of it. All simply because deviations from the perfect, make originality out of the average. 

Because of this, I too believe their choice of Iambic when it came to describing the imperfect in their poems, was also a reflection of their excitement on the naturalism of art. That keeping clean and proper doesn’t give you the excitement or originality that being unkempt and rambunctious does. It makes sense they’d have this opinion because most people don’t like being in the perfect ‘stressed, and unstressed’ patterns of life. We enjoy diversity and creativity where there seems to be a lack of. Being imperfect in art isn’t an inaccurate way of being artistic, its the only way to be; because art itself demands creativity–and that too at its core, is imperfect. 

Deep understanding of poetry

By: Randy Hernandez

I believe Moore poem title “Poetry” best defines poetry in general. Moore acknowledges the idea of showing the reader that there is more significant aspects to life than poetry. She begins her poem with the benefits of understanding poetry as she states “with a perfect contempt for it, one discovers in it after all, a place for the genuine”. When the reader has a great understanding of what the poet or writer is saying then they show a deeper interest in the work. The reader sees the writing as useful or seeing a purpose such as a “bat holding on upside down or inquest of something to eat.” Moore includes this list of what these animals actions hold a purpose the same way a writer may have. When poets write they always have a goal, whether it’s for pure joy, sharing sensitive issues or personal experiences. It’s not until one can’t get an understanding of poetry that they are “dragged into prominence by half poets, the result is not poetry”. This quote could refer to this idea of how one’s mind won’t see a purpose to certain aspects of what the poets wants the reader to understand. This results in them getting frustrated and not having a deep understanding of the poem. Then the reader sees no purpose or no big picture of why the poet wrote the poem. When Moore shows these two different aspects to poetry it helps define poetry in a general sense. At times it may be very difficult to understand, but other times it’s not too difficult. This idea of having to figure out what the poet wants to express in their writing is what poetry is about. It’s not until you have a deep understanding that you see the creativity, art or purpose to what the author wants the reader to see. 

Deep understanding of poetry

By: Randy Hernandez

I believe Moore poem title “Poetry” best defines poetry in general. Moore acknowledges the idea of showing the reader that there is more significant aspects to life than poetry. She begins her poem with the benefits of understanding poetry as she states “with a perfect contempt for it, one discovers in it after all, a place for the genuine”. When the reader has a great understanding of what the poet or writer is saying then they show a deeper interest in the work. The reader sees the writing as useful or seeing a purpose such as a “bat holding on upside down or inquest of something to eat.” Moore includes this list of what these animals actions hold a purpose the same way a writer may have. When poets write they always have a goal, whether it’s for pure joy, sharing sensitive issues or personal experiences. It’s not until one can’t get an understanding of poetry that they are “dragged into prominence by half poets, the result is not poetry”. This quote could refer to this idea of how one’s mind won’t see a purpose to certain aspects of what the poets wants the reader to understand. This results in them getting frustrated and not having a deep understanding of the poem. Then the reader sees no purpose or no big picture of why the poet wrote the poem. When Moore shows these two different aspects to poetry it helps define poetry in a general sense. At times it may be very difficult to understand, but other times it’s not too difficult. This idea of having to figure out what the poet wants to express in their writing is what poetry is about. It’s not until you have a deep understanding that you see the creativity, art or purpose to what the author wants the reader to see. 

The Beauty of Poetry

Arlyne Gonzalez
Construing Marianne Moore’s poem helped me comprehend the message she communicated about poetry which consisted of how poetry does not have to encompass complex vocabulary nor lavish diction. In other words, Moore was highlighting that poetry is a swift and concise technique of writing to avoid expressing one’s thoughts into massive blocks of writing. Moore carried the notion that one can be creatively expressive in their writing by utilizing genuine diction and tone that contributed meaning behind their intended message. For instance, Moore specified that integrating artistry diction into one’s poem can be meaningful if “eyes can dilate, hair can rise if it must, these things are important not because a high-sounding interpretation can be put upon them but because they are useful (Moore). Moore is saying that poetry can either be very colorful and ingenious with its diction that compels the reader to make an effort in attempting to fathom the text or poetry can be concise with momentous and concise language that the reader can effortlessly grasp and have no need to dive into complex thinking in order to annotate the text. Which is the reason Moore took it upon herself to revise a stanza in her poem replacing the word “fiddle” due to the word’s vague interpretation. Overall, Marianne Moore’s poem outshined Cummings’s and Ferlinghetti’s poems because Cummings’s poem made me feel I was construing a little child’s writing, meaning it was unorganized and did it did not consist of genuine diction, in fact, it was complex to understand. Ferlinghetti’s poem encompassed many words that were put well together, but I felt as though I was reading song lyrics that did not make sense and I could not find the important message about the poem. Which is why Marianne Moore’s poem outshined the other two because her message was easy to grasp. Her poem explained how the beauty of poetry does not have to consist of fancy language, but can also encompass little but meaningful thoughts.

A Blank Page

Poetry, at its basic essence, is simply the self expression of the human imagination. As a result of this nature, a poet may write lines of words with a certain image or meaning in mind, but these words could be interpreted in an entirely different way depending on the reader. I believe that it is upon the realization of this fact that Marianne Moore decided to reduce her original poem to a three line verse. The original imagery such as the “bat holding upside down” and the “wild horse taking a roll” may have personally resounded with her whilst contemplating genuine poetry, but these examples most likely were specific to her only. Thus, to better honor the freely creative spirit of poetry she decided to only use the first three lines to pique the reader’s interest and then leave the rest open for interpretation to allow the reader to personally contemplate what poetry is about. From comparing the revision to the original, it seems to me that even though it contains far fewer lines, the revised version presents the message that poetry is a beautiful thing to be appreciated in a more resounding and precise fashion. By removing the rest of lines, Moore essentially removes the aforementioned “fiddle” of the poem, enabling readers to readily contemplate and appreciate her meaning.